How to Break Free from the Trap of Social Comparison and the Hedonic Treadmill

 Introduction

Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in a rut, not making progress or that you’re stagnating? Days keep going by, you’re getting older and nothing exciting seems to happen. All of your friends on social media seem to be working hard, traveling, making progress, 

And living their best life, and then there’s you sitting on your couch and scrolling through your phone, chewing on that fast and cheap dopamine. But what if we told you that you’re being fed a destructive lie? What if we told you that you’re trapping yourself in a vicious cycle of stagnation and the only one responsible for all of this is you?

We live in a world that constantly pits us against one another, from school rankings, sports competitions, job promotions, to social media likes. But this kind of competition will only hold you back and eventually turn you into one of those social justice warriors who prefer screaming at a screen instead of making their bed first thing in the morning. Here’s an alternative: compete with yourself instead.

 If you’re not happy with where you are right now, you need to shift your mindset and relearn everything from scratch. Because whether we accept it or not, we are full of biases, and we strive to offer you unbiased and practical advice. So here are some psychological and scientific facts to support this argument.

The Social Comparison Theory

The social comparison theory was introduced by social psychologist Leon Festinger in 1954. This theory explains our innate tendency to evaluate ourselves by comparing our abilities, achievements, and attributes to those of others. Festinger argued that humans have a natural drive to gain accurate self-evaluations and reduce uncertainty about themselves, and social comparison serves as a means to achieve this.

There are two main types of social comparisons: upward and downward comparisons.

Upward social comparison occurs when we compare ourselves to people who we perceive as being superior to us in some way, such as having greater success, better skills, or a higher social status. While this type of comparison can sometimes inspire and motivate us to improve, it can also lead to feelings of inferiority and lowered self-esteem, especially if we perceive the gap between ourselves and the comparison target as unattainable.

On the other hand, downward social comparison involves comparing ourselves to people who we perceive as being inferior to us in some way. This type of comparison can sometimes boost our self-esteem and provide a sense of relief by making us feel better about our own abilities or situation. However, doing this can lead to complacency, hinder personal growth, and foster negative emotions like contempt or pity toward others.

Factors that Influence Social Comparison

Several factors can influence our tendency to engage in social comparisons. Personal attributes such as low self-esteem or high levels of self-doubt make people more likely to engage in social comparisons as they seek validation and reassurance. Situational factors, such as situations that provoke uncertainty or are a threat to our self-concept, can also trigger social comparisons.

 For instance, starting a new job or experiencing a significant change in your life can prompt you to compare yourself to people in your circle. Social comparison is more likely to occur when you’re in the presence of other people who you perceive as being similar to you or relevant to the specific domain of comparison.

Breaking Free from Social Comparison

To break free from the trap of social comparison, here are a few strategies you can follow:

Cultivate self-awareness: By cultivating self-awareness, you recognize when you’re engaging in social comparisons and acknowledge the emotions and thoughts associated with it. By becoming more self-aware, you can make a conscious effort to shift your focus back to your own personal growth and goals.